Everybody Needs A Coach

There are all sorts of coaches in life. Sometimes we all need someone to force us to see past our excuses and surprise ourselves.

Stella Is 10 Months Old This Week

My niece is such a cutie and so smart. Here is her latest photo. My sister said she's all smiley and laughing, and then the minute you turn the camera on her, she gives this look. We call it the Children of the Corn look. Oh well, it's still sweet.

Stella blows kisses and mimics our hand gestures, waving bye bye and hello, even the princess wave, and she clicks her tongue and makes all sorts of noises. My dad even has her talking like Donald Duck...no kidding. She doesn't use words, just the noises in that voice. I don't know how she figured out how he was making that voice with his throat, but she does it. She loves bling, so Aunt Dana is going to have to set her up with some necklaces and bracelets as soon as she can handle wearing them.

It is such a joy to have a beautiful and healthy little peanut in our lives. I love getting to spend time with her and I especially love holding her. What a blessing she is!

You Know How I Love Flowers...

SP brought me the most gorgeous bouquet of roses this weekend. He brings me some really beautiful flowers quite often, and he mixes them up so they're always different. I always love the orange ones he brings, and of course I love red. They're all beautiful. These ones take the cake. If there were a contest, SP has topped himself. They're in my dining room on the credenza now. I keep moving them from room to room as I move so I can be with them and look at them.

I'm serious.

I will try to get another picture as they open because this picture doesn't do them justice. They're a very pale pink with white and very pale green mixed in. They are exactly what I'd want if I had a garden lined with roses. Exactly!

I had to share. Gratitude. It's the little things that add beauty to our lives...

How's Your Vision Board?

I have a vision board that I put up in my home office probably a year ago. I was a little careless with it and didn't pay attention to it every day. Lately, I've made it a point to pause there in the morning instead of rushing right by. I take in the images and imagine the life I have coming to me and how wonderful it will be.

Have you tried this wonderful manifesting technique in your life yet? You can make a vision board out of anything. It can be a notebook with different goals on each page and then images that correspond to the goals. It can be a board, literally, like the one I've put together, where I've created a collage of some of the things I'm manifesting. It can be a video that you create for yourself, like a movie, enacting what life would be like if you had the things you're manifesting already.

You can continually add to it, you can remove items that you've already masterfully manifested. You can update it as your goals change and as you grow.

The point of the vision board is to hold your visions, goals and dreams every day for at least a few moments. View your vision board every day and let yourself step into it, as if the things you've posted are already in your life. It can be a powerful tool in aiding you at holding your visions and stepping into alignment with them.

Enjoy it! Do it with your kids. You can even make a family vision board together on the frig.

Need A Little Inspiration To Keep You Going?

Finding Your Purpose -- Attracting Your Bliss

This week I've been listening to Thomas Leonard's 28 Laws of Attraction while driving around instead of hearing the same songs looped endlessly over and over. The principle that inspired me has to do with doing the work that is most in alignment with our values. I have been beating this drum in my manifestation maps and journaling quite a bit lately. I keep writing that I want to manifest work that is an expression of my values.

So...what the heck does that mean, and how is it related to living your life's purpose? You know...that big question we all ask: What am I here to do?

I am always reading and taking in my fellow coaches and experts' writings on similar topics, and I happened across Vanessa Venos' blog, Musings from a Life Coach. I read some of her archived posts to see what her site is all about and, low and behold, I found the perfect quote about life purpose to use.

"If you asked a honey bee what it's purpose in life is, it would say it is to make honey for the colony. However, we know that a bee's life contributes a whole lot more to our world than just busily making honey. By doing its daily work, the honey bee in fact goes around and pollinates all the flowers and plants which results in new life for our planet. So just like in our lives, we may not realize what our big purpose in life is, by doing what we're passionate about, and by doing it well, with focus and determination, we may just affect a whole bigger purpose in our lives."

Honey bees, I'm pretty sure, don't think much about their values. I'm sure they also don't think much about their purpose. However, it is for the same reason that they don't think about these things but effortlessly fulfill their life's destiny. Honey bees follow their instincts and just do it, like the Nike ad says. We humans, on the other hand, think too much about it and get all kinked up about the rational reasons behind our activities, the shoulds, the financial aspects of our choices, the what will people thinks, you name it. That is precisely why this excercise may work to help realign you with your purpose.

Now, values are not things you need. Things you need are survival type things that you have to have day in and day out to keep going, to work, to live where you live, to stay healthy, etc. Values are a step further than that. They are things you want, things that do more for you than allow you to survive. They can propel you toward your life's purpose and create real passion and joy in your life in the day to day.

Take a nifty list of values (one can be found here) and read through them, underlining or circling those that speak most to you as you read and re-read them, narrowing them down to maybe a solid five or so values. These are the things in life that are most important to you. You may not know what they are right off hand, but in using the list, you may find that you are moved in some way by some of the values listed. Even if you skip over one thinking, "No, that's too fun, too good to be true, I can't have that," that one could be one of your top values. You may want to go back and circle it. Once you narrow it down to 3-6 solid values, take out a sheet of paper and draw a line down the center all the way. Now write your values on the left hand side of your paper.

Now, on the right side of the sheet, without regard to the values you have listed, write down your most sought after goals. Write down the long-term ones and the short-term ones. Go ahead, even the ones that nobody else knows about.

When you have your list of goals and your list of values, take a pencil and make a line from each goal to the value that it is expressing. Do this until you've lined them all up. If you have a goal that doesn't have a value that matches, that's ok, this is the purpose of this exercise. When you find a goal that doesn't line up with your values, you can use the opportunity to evaluate whether that goal is really one of your goals or just a should or another set of values imposed on you by your family, spouse, boss, or someone other than yourself. From there, you may want to re-evaluate why that goal is on your list. You may be able to rework the goal to better express your values, or you may want to replace the goal with something more expressive of the values you have identified that are important to you.

Once you have completed this exercise, you may want to re-write your values and goals on a clean, pretty sheet of paper or in a nice journal for easy reference and updating, without the scribbles and reminants of other people's values and goals or expectations of you left under the eraser stubble. Read it again, think about what it would feel like right now to be living those goals and expressing your values every day. Then go and do something fun that makes you feel good today.

In-House Life Coach?

Ok...I am in the middle of this manifestation exercise. I'm working on manifesting a new job. Yes, I've put resumes out. I'm going to link to it (on my webpage), too. So...to start off, here is my resume. Just click the link, and then click Dana's Resume on the right, and it'll open for you. My resume is floating around for legal and non-legal jobs. I am open to remaining in the legal profession and I'm open to exploring life beyond the legal profession as well.

Feel free to call and ask me more about my objectives if you know of something that is potentially a good fit. Or feel free to email me or, heck, post it here.

I was thinking, wouldn't it be neat if there were such a thing as an in-house coach? I think companies like SCJ in Racine have folks who serve this function for them in-house. I only think so because a barista at Starbucks on Hwy 20 told me that one day while waiting for my coffee. Imagine if businesses had coaches to find out the real skinny on what their employees' true strengths are and what they really want to do in life, so that they could get the most productivity out of their workers by giving them the right opportunities to shine and the right carrots for their efforts. I think it would make a world of difference in this cookie cutter employment world.

I saw a job posting for a company that does this type of thing...that's their entire business model. They travel globally and they send "experts" that work for their company who are trained in ways to make workforces more profitable, productive, etc. They analyze the workforce and engage the people within a client business. From there, they consult the business on what they can do to create more profitability with their workers. I would love to apply for that job, but it requires a move every 18-24 months, and the move might be to Uganda. Maybe if I was 20. I'm not 20 anymore. Oh...and they wanted people with at least 8 years out of school. So they want 35 year olds who never want to have a family, basically. Scrap that.

Life coaches in the workplace would serve employers as much as employees in that the company would be in the business of placing the right talent in the right position within the organization. I firmly believe that most employees want to do a good job and want to use their genuine talents. If management could find an effective way to match talent with staffing needs through coaching, it would benefit everyone involved.

I know a woman who is at the top of her game at a Fortune 500 insurance company. She is management, and a lawyer, and she is amazing. She's been a wonderful mentor for me along the way. One of the things she has taught me is that my coaching fits in with my legal profession. She prides herself on being a talent spotter of sorts, and takes pride in keeping her eye on people until she can find the right place for them. I guess you could call her a matchmaker, but in the career sense.

I find that employees and employers aren't always honest with one another. It can be a maze of code speak in two different languages. I remember the first week, month, months of my jobs when bosses would ask, "So...how do you like your new job?!" Um...who answers that honestly?

I recently read one executive banker's blog entry about how she took the advice from someone to interview all new hires after one month and get all of their observations about what seems odd, weird or out of place in the office or workplace, whether it has to do with systems, hardware, people or how the furniture is arranged. She actually takes criticism of new hires. Wow. I used to tell my new employers better ways to do things, but I quickly learned that didn't get me very far. To think there are bosses out there who listen and take what they can from it. We live in a world where the experienced folks think that they're the only ones who have anything to offer. They don't realize that sometimes fresh eyes and new ways of thinking can actually improve things for everyone involved. If I can find the posting again, I'll come back and link to it. The author said that management often misses a window of opportunity to see things through fresh eyes, when instead they ask the new hire how things are going and the new hire inevitably says, "Grrrrreat! I love it!" Most new hires don't know they have any other option if they want to keep their new job.

I digress. That was simply one example of how employees and employers can really have a huge wall up between them in terms of communication and expectations. Wouldn't it be nice if an honest dialogue could be had instead of speaking different languages and pretending to understand each other?

Well, either way, whether there is a job titled "in-house life coach" or not, I have decided that I want to be your go-to life coach for businesses and employees alike, alongside my entrepreneurial client base.

Groundhog Day Hibernation or Awakening?

You've seen the movie, haven't you? Bill Murray, Andie MacDowell...the main character is a news reporter covering Groundhog Day in Punxatawny, PA for the umpteenth year in a row. He gets stuck in a time warp of sorts, living the same day over and over, waking up to Sonny and Cher day after day, and eventually committing suicide so many times that he begins to think nothing matters and there is no way out. He explains that he's living the same day over and over to Rita, and she changes his out look by telling him that it doesn't have to be awful.

Suddenly, Phil begins to use each repeated day to get a leap on the next repeat. He learns the lessons he can learn and takes new talents into each day new day. He begins to realize that it's less about what he gets out of his day and more about what he gives each day, and that people remember more how he made them feel than anything else.

The movie Groundhog Day is a metaphor for the hibernation of the spirit, and the presence of personality or ego or self, and what happens when we realize that life is not about our personality or our self, but about others and how our spirit connects with and touches the other spirits around us. It's a choice that Phil is finally presented with. He can either continue to be with himself and hate every mundane repeat, or he can connect with others and find himself in the process.

Don't you sometimes feel like you wake up to the same day over and over? It's Monday!!! The alarm goes off, you pour your cup of coffee, eat a bowl of cereal, shower, don't even really care what clothes you put on, rush out the door and get through the work day only to repeat the process all over again tomorrow, with barely enough time in between to reflect and connect with yourself, much less others around you.

It is a universal principle that the present is perfect. In the law of attraction, every single thing in your life is there because you attracted it through your actions and your thoughts. You are exactly where you are supposed to be. If your days are exactly the same over and over, ask yourself why that is the case. What are you focusing on? What thoughts are you choosing? What is your self-talk? How do you value yourself?

Are you stuck in a pattern of complaining about the same things day in and day out? Do you fear that you couldn't do better if you chose something different to do with your days? If you are focusing on what you lack or the parts of what you have in your life that you hate, then you are a match for those things you don't want. When you transform your self-talk and your thoughts and you begin to focus on what you want and the positive things in your life, your vibration will be lifted and you will align with your desires, manifesting them much more quickly and changing your life in no time.

When you stand in appreciation for what is in your life every day, and you practice self-care in appreciating yourself and providing for your own needs, and when you are able to focus on your goals as if they are already accomplished, you are well on your way to leaving your personality behind and bringing your spirit forward to guide you. The inspired action that follows will astound you, much like it did with Phil Connors.

Give it a try. Make a list of what you appreciate about your day to day. Write on it all the good things in your life. Also write all the things you bring to the table every day, even the things that are not being utilized. Then make a list of what you want in your life. Go crazy. You can focus it on one goal or generalize it across all areas of your life. When you've listed what you want, write a bit about what it would feel like if you had it right now. Experience that. Let it sink in. Feel it as if you do have what you want already. Finally, when you've had some time to let it soak in, ask yourself what feels like the best thing for you to do next. It won't always have anything to do with your goals or wants that you just listed, and that's ok. It shouldn't be a should sort of thing. It should be something you feel inspired to do or something you that would make you feel good right now. This is more about raising your vibration to allow synchronicity to find you, and to invite what you want into your life. You're much more attractive to the things you want when you are vibrating higher energy as well as self-appreciation.

Try to do this for yourself as often as you can, every day if possible, and see how it makes a difference. Challenge this to see if it transforms you from the hibernating groundhog to the awakened one...from repeating the same Monday, to experiencing life more deeply every day.